life

What Makes You Brave? OTHSO60

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It’s Life On The Other Side of 60 LEARN edition.

It’s the scariest night of the year, Halloween. Celebrations range from sinister and evil while others – It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown, for instance, are fun and light hearted. The sinister stuff is meant to scare and frighten. I like to be scared every now and then – when I know it’s going to last for only a moment and it’s not ‘real’ (although that is debatable, too).

There’s a different kind of being afraid. And that kind is when we let fear define who we are. That’s what I’m addressing on this The Other Side of Sixty – Life – Live Brave.

Once upon a time I lived in fear. Fear had me bound up tight. And, not just fear of on one or two things. FEAR defined me. I was afraid of heights. I was afraid of open waters – so much so that I would get seasick standing on a dock watching boats out on the water. Oftentimes I didn’t want to go anywhere, claiming I was pretty much a homebody, when actually I am an extrovert, but I was afraid people weren’t going to like me. I was afraid because much of the time I didn’t like myself. I was afraid that if someone saw ME, the real me, then it was over but the singing. I was afraid to try new things. I was afraid to try any activity that required me to perform in front of others : bowling, zip-lining, church soft-ball. And, I still have a problem testing out a new mattress in public. I probably could call myself a justified fearful person, because my looks and character were severly judged when I was younger. So, then, I COULD be a victim of that and justify my fearfilled life.

In fact, I wouldn’t actually call myself anything because I tried to not do any sort of introspection. I had zero desire, as an more mature person to try and figure out why I was afraid. I realized, at one point that I was dealing with all the fear and feelings by eating. Literally eating my emotions. . to the point I reached 216 pounds.

What changed me? I am not free from fear, no, but I am free from the fear of fear. Is that a head scratcher?? It’s come in stages: My soulmate, the Man…Lance. We’ve been together for 45 years. He is my best friend and my husband, and the love of my life. When we would go on vacation he wanted to try all the things. Things requiring doing new stuff in front of strangers. I caved most of the time, but can say I was so scared during some events (zip-lining in Jamaica for the first time for instance,) I didn’t enjoy the time. I simple wished the activity would end. Then on one occasion, where we were going on a cruise and spending a lot of extra money on shore excursions. There was a walk through Rome, seeing the coliseum etc, which he suggested we forgo the guided tour and go on our own. He had proven through our long relationship that he wouldn’t put me in danger, and would always protect me. So, I decided, to trust him and if he suggested we do something, then I was going to say yes. This Rome excursion is one of our most fun memories. We got a little lost, bought some paintings that were probably done in China, we got lost in a torrential rain storm, the staircases of ancient buildings suddenly become waterfalls and we we talked about the possibilities we might miss the ride back to the ship! But, in it all, we were laughing and having the best time! We bought souvenir sweatshirts and ate thick slices of pizza from a street a cart before getting on the ride back to the ship. All of this because I had decided, made a choice to trust the character of my love and just say yes.

2. When we lived in Australia, we made some wonderful friends…we call them fRamily. We are Nan and Pa to some of the kids. We shared our lives. One of the reasons for my fear, the fear that manifested in seeking people’s approval and wanting everyone to like and to never disappoint anyone. I believe, is the bullying that took place in my younger years. Some boys had taken to call me Frankie because I was so ugly, they said, that I looked like the monster Frankenstein. When it was picture day, they would tell the photographer that I had to go last because I was so ugly I would break the camera. When it was time for us to move to the US from Canada, one of them left a copy of the Ugly American on my desk. I carried the destruction they wrought on my spirit for years. I was fearful. I believed their lies. Then, in Australia, one of our friend’s daughter’s had a lovely daughter. They named her Frankie…because in their native language Frankie meant beautiful. I decided that I would replace the broken Frankie meaning with this new one. And, there was a freedom. Then, I was given a painting of a woman, holding high an open cage with birds flying to freedom.

3. Ultimately though, it’s Jesus. When life is totally given over to Him….fear still creeps in, but you have the assurance that you’re not alone. He is the all in my all. If you don’t know Him, I am happy to introduce you! Fear shows itself in a variety of ways: anxiety, anger, crying, depression. But, know this…every fear, anxiety, anger whatever, you bring to Him, only secures our choice to trust Him. The bible assures us numerous times that God is always with us, has gone before us and will never leave us. We are told that Jesus is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. You can have that assurance too.

Recommended podcast : The Bema Podcast (a discipleship/evangelism podcast.)

Recommended devotional: Nobody Left Out: Jesus Meets the Messes by Michael Murray

Recommended song: Brave by Moriah Peters

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The Other Side of 60 Continued

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As we continue on the LIST, I’m particularly drawn to : Life. Let’s just say up front that for me to think that a person could address all of life things in one single podcast or blog, is absurd. So I’m not going to. I’m going to share what I’m learning in my life at the moment. For me, Life On the other side of 60 can seem a little shady. I have a tendency to look back at what could have been, and then look forward to what might be- either with hope or anxiety. Depends on the day.

Looking back. We got married way too young. I was 17 and he was 18 and he was fresh out of Marine Corps boot camp. We didn’t elope, it’s just that no one could make it to the wedding. We got married at nine o’clock at night at the Candlelight Wedding Chapel on the Las Vegas strip. It’s interesting that our actual wedding took place like this, the two of us without support, except for his Marine Corps mates, who honestly, were more interested in going to Vegas than our wedding. We’ve kind of lived this way our entire marriage. This year, we celebrated 43 years of marriage – 45 years together. It’s been sweet and at times, sour. There have been brilliant adventures and scary events. We’ve lost our parents. We both wanted a large family, but after numerous miscarriages we thought maybe God had other planes for us. But, our love kept us going.

This most recent move back from Australia to Texas marked our 34th address change since we’ve wed. I say we have itchy feet. Maybe some gypsy in our souls. The two things have allowed us to always see our way to each other: 1) Jesus. We are both devoted Jesus followers and He comes first in everything. 2) forgiveness. I forget who said it, but someone said that marriage is just two broken people forgiving each other. And, that in a nutshell is us.

Every now and again though, the one thing the Enemy whispers in my ear is my lack of education. A high school diploma doesn’t go far when you’re looking for a job. It’s long been a barb he poked and twisted in my esteem. It used to really bother me, but spending time with my adult children who are also our friends and who walk with Jesus, along with their spouses. (I refer to the spouses as my children, too, but people get confused.) I know we made the right choices in the early years. We have 15 grandchildren, who of course are fabulous and wonderful and beautiful. (and our fulfillment of the dream to have a big family! Some of that is because I wasn’t chasing an education in Josh and Jen’s formative years. Lance was working, studying making a way for our family to be secure and stable. Teamwork! That’s us~

Although I understand all this, …education or lack of, raised it’s head again last week. I was having all kinds of doubts about the blog and the podcast and what’s the point…and I picked up A.W. Tozar’s book on the Holy Spirit. He says, “How did God use someone as uneducated as me? I never finished the 8th grade. I never went to Bible College or Seminary. I was the least educated person God could select to use for His honor and glory. This brings me to the point that God does not choose us for who we are, or how qualified we are, but for who He is and what He is permitted to do in our lives.” Talk about a balm to my soul. I knew this already. Lance refers to it as being F.A.T. faithful, available, teachable. But in the long days and short years of this life, that had been buried. Reading this theologian speak what I think was amazing. So, I told the Enemy there’s no fortress for him here and in Jesus name he should go.

Looking forward: What I’m learning in Life On The Other Side of 60 means not wasting time on trivial stuff. It means earnestly seeking Jesus first thing in the morning, through the day and before I sleep at night. It means forgiving, forgiving, forgiving. It means loving first because He first loved us. (1 John 4:19) It means looking beyond the impossible to see the possible (Luke 1:37) through Jesus. Life on the other side of 60 means applying long ago learned truths to TODAY. Like F.A.T. and another one: put faith in the facts and the feelings will follow for days when I can’t see Him or hear Him. I have faith that his promises are just as real on my worst day as they are on my best day, because my faith is in him and not me or my feelings. I now see how good it is to take myself out of strained situations and regard others more important than me. (Philippians 3:2) Yet, this one remains challenging for me; it’s not necessary to attend every argument I’m invited to, nor is it necessary to be able to check the win column on my scoresheet because there is no more score sheet.

I’m learning that life is not supposed to be a feel good paradise. Often I would get frustrated with God because I was faithfully presenting my wish list to him, yet most of it wasn’t happening. Where was he? Then when hard times came, and things didn’t go as I planned, I thought he had abandoned me. But, now I see that’s WRONG! When the hard times come and the struggles come, I think He’s using that to show me His grace. Paul David Tripp says that ,”This present life is meant by God to be a time of preparation for our eternal home. ” I reckon now, if there are no struggles or challenges in my life, then I aught to search myself and see what’s going on or not going on. Another good Paul Tripp truth is that when we pray, it shouldn’t be us presenting a list of demands to him for his signature at the bottom, but rather, us presenting him a blank sheet of paper which we have already signed at the bottom, fully anticipating what He reveals.

We should always remember, that He is the same as he was yesterday, is today, and will be tomorrow. (Hebrews 13:8) His promises are faithful and true. (Colossians 1:27). Before I say the end, I’d like to ask a favor. I really enjoying feedback, and I appreciate when folks tell me if what I’ve said is nonsense or helpful. I’m going to keep doing them because I feel His urging to do so. Maybe someone just needs to read/hear that they are not alone in whatever they are going through. Maybe someone needs to be reminded we’re all flawed and on one is perfect. ( None. Nope, not even your favorite Pastor or Celebrity pastor.)

If you’d like to ask a question or ask for prayer, please do it. Would love for this to be more than a one way street.

Resources for this one:

Devotional : Restoration Year devotional by John Eldredge

Song: Good God Almighty – Crowder

Podcast: Living in Post-Christian America

AFTERTHOUGHTS

When I wrote this the complete and utter failure by the American government in Afghanistan had not yet taken place. I ask that you keep those who were left behind by the Biden/Harris administration (along with millions dollars of equipment) in prayer. Well, don’t keep the actual equipment in prayer, just the use of it, or the return of it. I’m reading online that the Afghan Church is still alive, despite being hunted. Please pray for Afghanistan.

Fairy Floss Faith or Mustard Seed Faith

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Cotton candy (U.S., India, Canada), candy floss, or candyfloss (UK, Ireland, New Zealand, India and South Africa), or fairy floss (Australia) is a form of spun sugar. Since it comprises mostly air, a small initial quantity of sugar generates a tremendously greater final volume, causing servings to be physically large and voluminous. A typical serving on a stick is approximately 1 ounce/30 grams. (Wikipedia)

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The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!” and the Lord said, “If you had faith like a grain of mustard seed, you could say to this mulberry tree, Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it would obey you. (Luke 17:6)

I’ve noticed a trend recently where strong faith, built on a firm foundation is being disregarded for a more superficial feel good kind of thing. The sort that is not really built with a small grain of mustard seed, which is small, tough, and prolific in its growing, but rather the sweet fluff of fairy floss. Light and wispy, nicely colored and sugary sweet.

What triggered my concern was a little meme I saw. It said, “Jesus doesn’t care how many bible verses you have memorized. He cares how you treat people,” this time instead of a quick chuckle and moving on, I paused because this meme is spreading a dangerous concept. How the devil must delight in this sort of thing! I reckon he’s not immune to using social media to twist and pervert God’s words, or mislead God’s kids. Am I a little too tightly strung? I really don’t think so.

While it’s true that Jesus does care about how we treat people, it is also very true that we, as his kids, must know his Word. So one does not have to be exclusive of the other. In fact, the two should go hand in hand.

I know some folks like to wield the word like a, (well, I was going to say sword, but it is indeed the sword of the spirit, Ephesians 6:17), so we’ll say instead hammer to hit a point home, and sometimes Jesus’ grace, mercy and love is entirely missing. But, we can’t let some people’s bad behavior prevent us from knowing Him completely.

To know Him is to know his WORD. Jesus himself quoted scripture when Satan, in the wilderness, tempted him:   Matthew 4:3 – During that time the devil came and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become loaves of bread.”  But, Jesus told him, “No! The Scriptures say, People do no live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.'”  Then the devil took him to the holy city and set him on the highest point of the temple, and said, “If you are the Son of God, jump off! For the Scriptures say, ‘He will order his angels to protect you. And they will hold up with their hands so you won’t even hurt your foot on a  stone.'” Jesus responded, “The Scriptures also say, ‘You must not test the Lord your God.'”  (Matthew 4:5) Next, the devil took him to the peak of a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory.  “ I will give you it all to you,” he said, “if you will kneel down and worship me.” “Get out of here, Satan,” Jesus told him, “For the Scriptures say, ‘ You must worship the Lord your God and serve only him.'”  (Matthew 4:8-10).  And the result? Then the devil went away, and angels came and took care of Jesus. Matthew 4:11 (NLT)

So that’s a whole lot of Jesus answering Satan with the Word. Does this mean we should do the same? Yes! Consider the Psalm 119:11, “I have hidden your Word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” Finishing with Psalm 119:16 “I will delight in your decrees and not forget your word.” These two verses indicate the Word is important to have so well learned that we won’t forget them.

We all know the most famous verse for memorizing his Word; Deuteronomy 6:5-7 -‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and will all your might. And, you must commit yourselves whole heartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talks about then when you are home and when you are on the road, when you are getting up and when you go to bed.’ How’s this going to happen if you’re just tripping along in your walk with him feeling good and treating others nicely? How will you determine the true needs of yourself and others if you don’t know how to apply His Word to your life or to their life? There’s hope, peace, love, truth, life and rest in His Word; you do yourself a huge wrong if you don’t know it.

A recent twitter from a famous Christian author said, “God is not surprised when hard times hit, he is surprised when you quit.” Really? God is taken by surprise when I do something? Well, maybe the author didn’t know about Joshua 3:1-15, which tells us that God is already in our tomorrows. And, Jeremiah 29:11- “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and hope.”, or, Romans 8:28 -“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose.” How can we surprise Him if he has it all worked out? The trouble is we too often go to popular authors works instead of going to the Word to get our doctrine and our answers, and the problem with that is – Authors are wholly human. God is not.

I had a conversation once with a sister-in-him who was struggling with a life issue. After talking and searching the word, we prayed, and she quoted something she had read from a book called, “Jesus Calling.” I had never heard of this book, but even if I had, I would still have advised her to go to the Word. Her response? “I don’t know how to read the Word.” Really? If you know how to read a book, you know how to read THE book. And are directed to do so. In Acts 17:11 – ” And, the people of Berea were more open-minded than those in Thessalonica, and they listened eagerly to Paul’s message. They searched the Scriptures day after day to see if Paul and Silas were teaching the truth.”

God gave us a book full of direction, hope, and love so that we could survive in this temporary life. It is a love letter to us. Maybe because the days of getting a hand written letter in the mail is long gone we don’t really appreciate what this means. But, even still, getting an email from a loved one is often received with joy and read repeatedly. We eagerly read to see what the person’s been up to, what they think, what they want, how they feel. The same should be for the Word of God.

I’m afraid if we don’t know the Word we’ll be like the man who built the house on the sand and when the storms of life wail against us our house (we) will fall. Or as Ephesians 4:14 says -‘Then we will no longer be immature children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth’.

Jesus says that if we have faith as small as a mustard seed (which is about the size of a pinhead), we can tell a tree to uproot itself and plant itself somewhere else and it will, and we can tell a mountain to move and it will, but if we don’t know his word, have it planted in our hearts and minds, how will we have such a strong faith?

Fairy floss faith requires nothing more than sugary sweet thoughts, and performing warm loving acts and deeds. We eagerly believe each ‘big author’ that puts out a Christian book or a podcast which can lead to spiritual  stomachaches and soul cavities from the overly sweet fodder.

Yes, it is important to show His grace, mercy and love. 1 Corinthians 13:13 it says, ”Three things last forever-faith, hope, and love -and the greatest of these is love.” Let’s strive to have a full and rich journey with Him, knowing His Word while loving those in this temporary world.

Linda Mae Baldwin

Baldwinacres

The Holder. The Watcher.

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IMG_8587I am the Holder. The Watcher. It was always an excuse to elude addressing my fear of heights when the family rock climbed. (I’d hold the goods and watch from the picnic spot.) It was my excuse for not wanting to ride Space Mountain – I’d hold the strollers and watch the stuff in line while the rest of the family screamed in delight from their speedy perches. Truth:  for practically any family thing, I was the supreme holder and the watcher.

As my two children grew I’d be the holder of hands through tumultuous times. The holder of hair while she threw up a weird ‘condition assaulting her young body. I was the holder of a broken heart when an injury put a stop to playing high school football. I was the watcher of the clock when they kept late nights. Then the watcher of emotional and spiritual temperaments. But, then I was also the holder of  prayer for them. And for me to do my mom job effectively. Lifting each family member in prayer as our spiritual and emotional temperatures waxed and waned.

Some folks don’t get it. Being the holder and the watcher means missing out on the fun or missing out on adventure. But for me, being the holder and the watcher has taken me on an adventure of spiritual highs and lows, watching causes me to see sweet things – the subtle smiles, the mischievous grin, the tiniest twinkle in their eyes, that would have otherwise been missed. Being the holder and watcher doesn’t stop when the children are grown, though, it’s alive and well with the grands, now! Although I don’t get to practice as often as I would like. In fact, as I look back now, I missed things. My watchfulness was often clouded by my human heart to see them happy. I get it that happiness is not the end all but when the kids were hurting or sick, my mom heart desperately desired for them to be happy and hear them laugh.

Now, I can’t see them. In fact even with Facetime and Skype we rarely speak face to face. Our relationship takes place via texts, some calls, emails and I catch a lot of news on Facebook.  For whatever reason, God has put them up in the PNW and us in Texas. But, even now, I can close my eyes and there they are in the memories I’ve been holding through all the years of watching.

Through the years I’ve moved beyond watching and holding. And, now, I am a doer. An adventurer. And, I cherish those years of watching and holding.

 

Happiness or Joy??

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It’s only a couple of days into 2018 and my social media feeds are full of people pushing happiness. Happiness. I wonder why I feel like this is wrong, but I do. Maybe it’s because God often moves me out of perfectly fine states of happiness to places of discomfort, and awkwardness. He leads me on arduous journeys that are sometimes the exact opposite of happy. There have been times when I’ve been coasting on auto pilot, perfectly content where I am – physically, emotionally, geographically, and God in His perfect wisdom and love leads me over there..or there…or up there. Oh sure, I reckon it’s up to me to follow, and if I just want to wallow in my self-induced happiness He’ll just leave me here I am.  It’s my choice. And, I know, because my Father and I have walked together for a lot of years, that when I follow HIM, the final destination will not be ‘happiness.’ In fact, no matter where He leads me, at the end of it, truth is, I pray that my state of being is not ‘HAPPY.’ Because, what I’ve learned is, that in this temporary world, there will be plenty of happy times, sad times, glad times, grieving times. Seasons of our lives dictate our circumstances, but our relationship with God dictates the state of our souls. And, the state of our souls is how our emotions go. When I am happy, it is very comfortable and it feels good.  Sure some of the happiness may be God ordained, ( the myth that Christians always need to be in some conflicted state is, in my opinion, incorrect, ) but, when I follow Him, the destination leads not to ‘happiness’, but to JOY. I will gladly give up any self induced ‘happiness’ for God ordained JOY.

Consider some of my favorite scriptures about God: For the kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and JOY in the Holy Spirit. Romans 14:17 NLT. The Lord is my strength and shield. I trust him with all my heart. He helps me, and my heart is filled with JOY. I burst out in songs of thanksgiving. Psalm 28:7. Taste and see that the Lord is good. Oh, the JOYS of those who take refuge in Him. Psalm 34:8 NLT.

In 2018 I want to live intentionally for Him and with Him. I want to, without hesitation, follow where he leads. Travel with him. Introduce people to Him and for those who already know Him, encourage them to move past happiness and discover His joy. It’s a journey worth taking.

His faithful love will never disappoint.

“The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My (Jesus) purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying live. ” John 10:10 NLT.

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Gypsy feet are on the move again,but the body resists.

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Just about this time, one year ago, God moved us to Australia, again. We arrived thinking we would be here for a long time. We bought a car that we could explore this magnificent country in, some nice furniture that would last awhile, and signed a lease into the next year. Now, all that has changed.

We are heading back to America (to live in Texas this time) and find ourselves doing another international move in the span of 12 months. I truly believe God has it all handled and all the pieces will fit into the move puzzle, but my body seems to have not recieved the memo. Everything hurts. Sleep is elusive. The gut is acting up big time. Frustrating! Every night after four hours of restless sleep, I get up, achy, stiff, sore. My mind wants to start the day, tackle the chore list, start the decluttering but my body stumbles to the recliner and if not for some vigorous self talk would stay there. I feel like I am living that scripture in Matthew – “the Spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.” or as the Message puts it, “there is a part of you that is eager, ready for anything in God. But there’s another part that’s as lazy as an old dog sleeping by the fire.” That’s me – an old dog sleeping by the fire (but there’s no fire).  Mostly, though, this old dog wants to sleep.

In the years from 2010-2014 we were active folk. We did skydiving, scuba diving, hiking, biking, and all manner of exploring. From 2014-2016 we had our little hobby farm and had our family close. Although we didn’t see the adult kids that often, we did entertain the grands on many occasions. Then we moved back here. But the year, 2016 was stress filled, too…unemployement, a new job full of uncertainty and then the move back to Australia. Then 2017 brought new changes to the new job, and the realization that our plans to buy a house here etc, wouldn’t come to fruition. More stress. But, all along my walk with Jesus grew closer. I heard the Spirit more clearly, when I read the Word, things seems very evident, no mystery. So, why can’t my body catch up with the Spirit?

I reckon this is where intentional living comes to play. Managing all aspects of life. What we eat. What we drink. How we move our bodies. How we interact with others. When we sleep. What we nourish our brains with. What we feed our spirit with. I feel like I already do most of it, but probably lazy in some areas. Honestly, the thought of doing any more tires me. But, it’s necessary.

So, how’s your walk through this temporary world going?? How can you change things? or are you ok with the way things are? Is your subconscious reacting one way, while your spiritual life seems to be another? Why? God doesn’t give us a spirit of fear but of courage and power and a stable mind, so don’t be afraid of changing things. Don’t fear diving into why you may be having trouble sleeping, exercising, or any questions of life in general. No worries. His desire is for  you (and me) to have a rich and satisfying life! (John 10:10 NLT).