family

Essential Tips for Spinal Fusion Recovery Success

/ Baldwin Acres / 2 Comments

As I start to write this, I’m 11 weeks post spinal fusion surgery. (TLIF) I’ll tell ya, this arthritis, that is slowly destroying my bones/joints is unpleasant. The medical folk refer to it as a degenerative bone disease. Seems like and overly weighted description to me, but after a shoulder replacement, a reverse shoulder replacement, one knee partial replacement and, now, a spine with a wonked out vertebrae slipping forward, (spondylolisthesis), along with developing scoliosis and faucets growing on most of the vertebrae in my spine.

The condition wasn’t helped with steroid shots, physical therapy or meds, so surgery it is – if I could continue working the farm. We had multiple decompressions and the TLIF (Transforaminal Lumbar Interbody Fusion) surgery (spinal fusion where they shoved the rebellious vertebrae back in it’s proper spot, screw it in and add some kind of something that will grow around it making it one with the spine.)

This was the most painful recovery I’ve had. I also had alonger stay in the hospital than anticiapted because my drain would not comply and kept filling up. Also, I had an absolute terrible nurse, who was uncaring, and totally not willing to do her job. When it came down to it, I had to report her. The other nurse I encountered after I had a run in with the neglegent nurse (who was very unconcerned about a bout of incontinece caused by a higher does of muscle relaxer than necessary) the next nurse met a woefully sobbing me. We had to report her to the head nurse. But, anyways, always be an advocate for yourself, is what I learned

.I’m not sure if it’s because I’m older or because it was the spine or what…but that first week at home was awful…I had to assure my husband it was ok to not pay attention to the noises I was making because they were absolutely involuntary….also, don’t pay attention to the crying – also involuntary. He was sweet and prayed for me often, but was worried all the same.

The instructions after surgery are to not BLT (Bend, lift or twist) for quite awhile – my surgeon said it could take up to a year to be ‘normal’ but by 6 months I should be able to BLT again. In preparation for the recovery, my husband and I went to the nursery and bought some starts for our raised garden bed. The idea was, being 64, I pretty much know myself and understand I’m pretty lazy and prone to like comfort. So, if I had these starts that would HAVE to get planted, I’d make the walk to the garden every day after planting them. The pain was so absolutely unbearable there was no way I could get out there to water things let alone plant things. My husband still works fulltime and is a late evening/weekend rancer so we called in some help.

One grand came out for the weekend and helped my husband get the starts in the ground so the money wasn’t wasted! Garden saved!

Eventually I was able to cast aside the walker but my smart watch kept warning me that my walking was unstable and I was in danger of falling. There was little doubt I would return to the walker and I really didn’t want to use an old lady cane (yes, I know I’m an old lady, but I don’t want to garnish myself as one), so I bought a rustic walking stick to help me stay mobile and not fall. I also bought some sturdy ‘recovery flip flops’ that were solid (see below).

I’m picking this up at 19 weeks post TLIF – life has busy but I’ve been able to keep up! God has healed me very quickly. I want to encourage folks, if the option of getting spine surgery scares you, I would encourage you to reconsider.

Here’s a few things that helped me:

  1. Lots of rest.
  2. Someone who can be there 24/7 at first.
  3. There’s a special personal hygiene item that seriously help with toileting. On Amazon search for Fanwer Toilet Aids Tools,Long Reach Comfort Wipe,Extends Your Reach Over 15″ Grips Toilet Paper or Pre-Moistened Wipes.

4. These thick flip flops give stability to walking. https://a.co/d/hbkHQgJ shevalues Orthopedic Sandals for Women Arch Support Recovery Flip Flops Pillow Soft Summer Beach Shoe

5. This walking stick. Backyard Expressions 55 in Rustic Wood Walking Stick, Traditional Style Handle, for Men & Women, Trekking Pole, Hiking Pole, Walking Stick.

This stick was a neccisaty when I got rid of the walker, but I needed some support for stabilty but didn’t like the traditiaonl cane. Very affordable and helpful to regaind independence.

6. This cushion, I got it at costco for less than $50. When it came time to start sitting at my desk and working, my previous perfectly adequate office chair was not making sitting very comfortable. My hips would get stiff and achy within minutes. So, we bought this and it has made all the difference. Type S Smoothing Premium Comfort Memory Foam Seat Cushion – Ergonomic Back Pain Relief for Coccyx Tailbone Sciatica Back Pain Relief for Office Chairs

Finally, make sure to have in qeue your a book stack, maybe kindle stack, podcasts, tv shows, movies and new music playlists. It makes it easier to just dial in instead of having to research when you’re semi out of it. Also, I found some great bible studies to do…Awake by Prisciall Shrier, Adamant by Lisa Bevere, and the Devine Conspiracy by Dallas Willard, in additon to digging into my Life Application Study Bible which has a abundance of resources.

Keep praying..you’ll be up and about at no time.

Playlist suggestions : anything by Matthew West, Mercy Me and Forrest Frank.

The Holder. The Watcher.

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IMG_8587I am the Holder. The Watcher. It was always an excuse to elude addressing my fear of heights when the family rock climbed. (I’d hold the goods and watch from the picnic spot.) It was my excuse for not wanting to ride Space Mountain – I’d hold the strollers and watch the stuff in line while the rest of the family screamed in delight from their speedy perches. Truth:  for practically any family thing, I was the supreme holder and the watcher.

As my two children grew I’d be the holder of hands through tumultuous times. The holder of hair while she threw up a weird ‘condition assaulting her young body. I was the holder of a broken heart when an injury put a stop to playing high school football. I was the watcher of the clock when they kept late nights. Then the watcher of emotional and spiritual temperaments. But, then I was also the holder of  prayer for them. And for me to do my mom job effectively. Lifting each family member in prayer as our spiritual and emotional temperatures waxed and waned.

Some folks don’t get it. Being the holder and the watcher means missing out on the fun or missing out on adventure. But for me, being the holder and the watcher has taken me on an adventure of spiritual highs and lows, watching causes me to see sweet things – the subtle smiles, the mischievous grin, the tiniest twinkle in their eyes, that would have otherwise been missed. Being the holder and watcher doesn’t stop when the children are grown, though, it’s alive and well with the grands, now! Although I don’t get to practice as often as I would like. In fact, as I look back now, I missed things. My watchfulness was often clouded by my human heart to see them happy. I get it that happiness is not the end all but when the kids were hurting or sick, my mom heart desperately desired for them to be happy and hear them laugh.

Now, I can’t see them. In fact even with Facetime and Skype we rarely speak face to face. Our relationship takes place via texts, some calls, emails and I catch a lot of news on Facebook.  For whatever reason, God has put them up in the PNW and us in Texas. But, even now, I can close my eyes and there they are in the memories I’ve been holding through all the years of watching.

Through the years I’ve moved beyond watching and holding. And, now, I am a doer. An adventurer. And, I cherish those years of watching and holding.

 

Ten Trips and Memories

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We have been blessed with 13 Grandkids…(and three unofficial official Grands in Australia). Each is uniquely blessed by our Creator with different personalities, gifts and talents. A gathering of everyone often includes lots of laughter and, as families go, maybe some tears…but always – good memories. The 13 North American cousins all love to be together. But, you can imagine the struggle it is to get to individually know them. Somewhere along the way, the Baldwin family came up with the idea of Ten Trips. (we have since discovered that famous author Bob Goff also did Ten Trips with his kids, so I feel like we are on the right track.)

What is a Ten Trip? A Ten Trip takes place when a Grand celebrates their tenth birthday (or, if we move out of country during that time, their 11th birthday. I’m looking at you, Abigail.) A Ten Trip is made up of something that that Grand wants to do. Here’s a run down of what we have done to date:

  • Caleb – Caleb was our first trip. He loves sea life and at that time – he’s almost 18 now – he loved whales. So we took him on our boat up to the San Juan Islands and visited the whale museum Orcas Island Whale Museum. We spent a day or two motoring around the Islands, where he learned to Skipper, and then made our way back to home. During the tooling around time Caleb drew (he’s quite a fantastic artist), learned how to BBQ on the boat with Papa and mastered the rowing of the dinghy. We had hours to sit and watch the porpoises leap by, fish, go ashore, eat out, listen to dreams and worries, and to pray with and over him.
  • Manning the ship!
  • Jacob – (we call him Cubbie or Cubster although we can’t remember why we nicknamed him that). He was a big Seattle Mariners fan. In fact he stated that he would be their BIGGEST fan, if it didn’t cost so much. Obviously a Mariners game was on the schedule! We got great seats and ordered the Mariners Birthday Package  In the birthday package, you not only get your birthday on the scoreboard, but you get a Mariner bag full of goodies, including a cool hat. He also wanted to spend time on the boat. We moored  at the Elliott Bay Marina. This was and wasn’t a great idea. The marine hosted a party with loud music, so sleep was elusive. Cubs also learned about cooking on the boat, Skippered for a bit and slept on the deck. Long talks on the water and about life during the game  (because, you know ..baseball..)..followed by prayers in the evening, are what Nana remembers most!  We fished on the way home, and he learned how to row the dinghy.
  • (Some things were almost becoming a right of passage.)
  • Ben was the next one up. Ben loves survival stuff and shooting and fishing. We took him up to our favorite fishing resort in Sekui, Mason’s Olsons’s Resort. We not only caught some yummy salmon which he then helped Papa smoke and grill, we explored the land around the inlet. Ben collected drift wood and shells and then Ben Captained the boat. We didn’t moor but instead rented one of the resorts stand alone cottages. The cottage was right on the beach with feet of sands before us. He went out with Papa to fish, and I stayed behind a couple times.  It was a lot of fun. He too learned about BBQing on the boat and how to handle the dinghy. Then we did some shooting at targets. Both pistols, rifles and crossbows. Ben talked often with Papa about life…and of course there were Prayers!
  • tentripben.jpg
  • Sylvia. Our first girl 10 Trip! She wanted to wait until it was warmer, so we could go on the boat. But the weekend we did it, the weather never cooperated. Her big thing was Indoor skydiving. But, we also went to a movie, went to a game arcade so she and Papa could get their competitive spirits going and ate out..a lot. Our alone times were dotted with talks and games and prayers.
  • Abigail. Abs is the one that had to wait until her 11th birthday for her Ten Trip, because we had moved to Australia the year of her 10th. We moved back the year of her 11th and flew her to Texas for her Ten Trip. She says that it was worth the wait. The move to Texas wasn’t really planned, but for Lance it was a homecoming, as he was born in Dallas and lived in Texas until the fifth grade. He still has (beautiful) family there, so we weren’t alone in our move. We had lived in our home for only four months when Abigail flew down! She was the second person to use our guest room! Flying down was of course a huge part of her trip. I think she was very brave, being that she was going as unaccompanied minor. And, she really didn’t remember her other flights. We had a full schedule for the Grand who had awaited the longest for her time with Nana and Papa. We ventured to Dinosaur Valley. It was hot and muggy. But what a delight. She stepped into actual Dinosaur prints and she and Papa swam in natural lagoon. It was an incredible feeling to realize we were standing, swimming, walking, where Dinosaurs had once roamed! We swam at our housing developments water park almost every day, swam with Aunt Jenna and Uncle Jim a couple times at their home, watched some movies, ate good food. We took a day for rest and then went kayaking on Lake Lavon.  The next day, because she is very creative and artistic we went to the Crayola Experience.  Of course we spent some good times giggling, dreaming and praying together.

All the Ten Trips end too soon. Time alone to listen to their dreams and fears and accomplishments. The year after their birthday we give them a scrapbook with pictures and narrative of the time together.

Their parents have commented that they would really like a Ten Trip, but you know, they’re way to old! It’s challenging enough to think that the first Ten Trippers are now 18, 16, 14 and almost 12! But, just wait a bit, with so many Grands there will be another one any moment! In fact, next year we have THREE Ten Trips to plan! God has blessed us more than we could ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20)

God has moved Lance and I all over the globe. That could prove challenging to be involved in our Grandkids lives. But, then He has also provided ways to be able to connect and make memories that, hopefully, will last them, and us, a life time, including, Ten Trips.

My big dream now, is to be able to take EVERYONE (including the Grand’s parents) on some kind of big family vacation. We’ll see how God works that out!

I’m speaking in general terms now : Most grandparents agree that family is important. We reach empty nest stage with maybe a little sorrow, maybe a little glee. And, usually, we all think that season of live arrives too fast.  And, maybe dream of empty nest time as finally ‘me’ time. But, as I see it, family is a God given gift and while we are here on this planet for a short time, we need to cherish those entrusted to us. God gave ’em to us. That is an incredible privilege.

Make sure to take time to connect with those closest to you and don’t get lost in the daily minutiae of life. Daily stuff is nice. Daily stuff: phone calls, texts, watching tv, doing homework together is great, don’t get me wrong. Wish I could do that. But, since I can’t I will devote time to do it…you can, too.

This is time spent that no one will regret.

Proverbs 17:6 Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged.